Attachment Disorder

Hi - so I'm still working and I haven't seen a lot of changes in the mental health environment.  I don't like it.  A lot of it is due to the economy - perhaps things will improve in the future.  I also live in the midwest and that area is not recovering quickly, and Illinois is broke, so... My heart goes out to the many families struggling with these difficult children but that aren't getting a lot of help.  I am available for services but families having money to pay for them is a problem, and DCFS seems to claim they cannot pay. I am working on youtube videos and a  book which may help out there.  Perhaps there will be other ways to get services out there.  I am also available for online counseling services, phone counseling, etc.  There are other ways.  You can also email me at  appell4@gmail.com if you have questions and my phone is 815-398-8422. And my website is here . 

The economy sure has an impact on the families that have adopted children with attachment disorder.  The services are more difficult to get and finances and promises that were made when children were adopted are no longer being kept.  "They are your problem now" seems to be the demeanor.  I am sorry to see people in power act the way they are.  It seems I have provided a great deal of service because of my ethics and would probably do so again.  I wish more people felt that way.  Check out my website. So I want you to know you aren't alone out there, that there are those of us who care.  Unfortunately, free services are hard to come by, and maintain.  1.There is federal money in some adoption preservation programs, so you might want to look for them in your area - those are free.  2. For those of you with the medical card for the children, I'm sorry to say that there is not much specific to attachment disorder.  Your only options are...

So school has begun. That always bring up many different dilemmas for parents of children with attachment disorder (p-cwad). Some of those issues: The school thinks the mom is crazy, the mom feels very alienated from the school, the child can be cute and charming in school setting, child manipulates at school and comes home feeling empowered, getting homework done becomes an issue, if child is homeschooled there are issues in that, parents have to struggle to decide what their responsibilities are in their child learning, and there is always the possibility that there will be those DCFS calls when the school hears things from the CWAD that makes them question what is going on at home. So, what are the parents to do? Stay tuned.

I have seen a number of families helping each other out. I think those P-cwad and C-cwad ) (parents and caregivers of children with attachment disorder) can be very supportive to each other as you all share common experiences and one of the best supports is talking to others who live through it or are living with it, and also those who have seen improvements. I also have had several parents who have been willing to provide some respite for others. I only recommend the respite if I think the respite caregiver will follow a structured, tight childcare. NONE of my P-cwad and C-cwad have ever wanted the child to go away and come home worse!! Makes things worse at home and child then feels superior. Many things in the cwad realm are mysteries - I often say I don't know why and, again, we could go crazy trying to get in the minds of these children and trying to understand them with our minds. Sometimes it is best to let go, shrug your shoulders, say it "just is" but discipline ...

June 25 and here i am. It has been a busy time. This year I have been involved with a number of court cases this year. The need continues. I am hoping to provide services in different ways that I can reach more people, parents, professionals, etc. Parents continue to appreciate someone who understands, believes, offers some guidance, etc. I believe there is a difference in therapists who "say they understand attachment issues" and those who "truly understand attachment disorder behaviors." There are the shy, withdrawn people with attachment "fears" but the children I work with are those who have internalized many negative behaviors which push family members away, especially Mom. And these behaviors do not respond to more love and kindness. It calls for an alternative way of being and parenting. So many parents - P-CWAD - are so frustrated and lost because nothing is working, and because no one understands what they are doing and why they are ...