Attachment Disorder

Attachment Disorder   I have not attended many trainings, and I know there isn’t much training out there. And what’s current? The list of behaviors probably doesn’t change much. What is the connection with ACES - Adverse Childhood Experiences.  I went to a luncheon with a man who was a nationally respected doctor who helped organize, sponsor, collect data from studies. The conclusion was that HOPE - positive experiences can help overcome some of the negative. A perfect example is a little girl who was in a bombing in Syria - she has been exposed to horrific ACEs. But if she is surrounded by loving family, has been transferred to a safe environment, has a positive experience in the refugee camp, then her ACEs will not have as much negative affect on her adult life, including illnesses, etc. The talk did not focus on attachment, behaviors, etc. There were many CASA workers there, and a CASA worker’s job is to work with foster kids and make sure their case gets ...

The Attachment Disorder Dilemma Attachment Disorder Updates Hi - just a quick comment to let you know I'm out here, trying to offer support when I can.  The news has brought news of relevance to parents of children with RAD - as I lovingly term them, CWAD.  Children with attachment disorder.  Anyway, I had a mom say to me after the awful Newtown news, that she could relate to being the mother of that young man that was so "sick."  I realize that is true.  It was awful to believe that someone has that ability, but some of you parents - P-CWAD - have seen those moments in your children. The second news segment that just happened is about Russia banning adoptions to the US.  As another person said, that's probably good news for some of the parents, because sometimes the children from Russia have many, many issues.  But there are those children that provide a great deal of joy.  And there are parents who are currently waiting for some of thos...

Hi - so I'm still working and I haven't seen a lot of changes in the mental health environment.  I don't like it.  A lot of it is due to the economy - perhaps things will improve in the future.  I also live in the midwest and that area is not recovering quickly, and Illinois is broke, so... My heart goes out to the many families struggling with these difficult children but that aren't getting a lot of help.  I am available for services but families having money to pay for them is a problem, and DCFS seems to claim they cannot pay. I am working on youtube videos and a  book which may help out there.  Perhaps there will be other ways to get services out there.  I am also available for online counseling services, phone counseling, etc.  There are other ways.  You can also email me at  appell4@gmail.com if you have questions and my phone is 815-398-8422. And my website is here . 

The economy sure has an impact on the families that have adopted children with attachment disorder.  The services are more difficult to get and finances and promises that were made when children were adopted are no longer being kept.  "They are your problem now" seems to be the demeanor.  I am sorry to see people in power act the way they are.  It seems I have provided a great deal of service because of my ethics and would probably do so again.  I wish more people felt that way.  Check out my website. So I want you to know you aren't alone out there, that there are those of us who care.  Unfortunately, free services are hard to come by, and maintain.  1.There is federal money in some adoption preservation programs, so you might want to look for them in your area - those are free.  2. For those of you with the medical card for the children, I'm sorry to say that there is not much specific to attachment disorder.  Your only options are...

How is the media about attachment disorder lately?  I really don't know even though I do therapy.  When I worked in child welfare the talk was much greater, but I am now in schools and never hear about it.  I believe part of it is the economy.  Families are being abandoned and having to deal with the issue on their own as there are not many resources available anymore.  I received a perfect email today from someone really struggling and they had tried many available resources but they did not work with true RAD kids - actually i prefer CWAD - child with attachment disorder.  So many options are a waste of time and very frustrating to parents, giving the CWAD even more power. I feel very bad for families when this happens as it is so much wasted time, but more than that, it is energy and emotional health at stake, that of the parents. Life's Outlook Here's my website .

Well, when I looked at my statistics, the blog that got the most attention was the blog post re: CWAD - children with attachment disorder.  The parents of those children are called PCWAD by me.  I will be writing a book re: this issue.  I have worked in this field for a LONG time and have heard from parents that I understand the issue very well.  I have very much enjoyed helping the families that have adopted these children.  Sometimes I can help the children, and sometimes I cannot.  I believe a lot of it is up to them. I don't get many comments from families with attachment disordered children.  I know there are some links, support groups online, etc.  that families have found helpful.  I have found that support has decreased a great deal.  Counseling, etc.  is cut back due to insurance and state support.  Families are left in the position of having to pay for therapy themselves, and cannot often afford this.  Some peo...

I have worked with a number of years with children with attachment disorder (CWAD).   What is their need to be in control about?   That is one of the symptoms of Attachment Disorder and it is a major one that gets in the way of being a part of a family.   I have come to believe that children that have been abandoned and developed attachment disorder have to stay in control of their own life as they feel they will die if they are NOT in control of their own life.   Well, imagine an infant and/or a fetus who is not taking care of, nurtured, fed, changed, held.   Well, if they are going to survive they need to stay in control of their own life and being.   No one else took care of them.   From that perspective isn’t it easy to understand why they need to stay in control.   A matter of life or death for them.   The need to be in control for CWAD can show up as a refusal to cooperate with anything they are told to do, they will do it their way....

Danger! What is attachment disorder?  Well, that requires a subjective answer, but I will write more from my perspective of trying to help people who have adopted or taken in children who have children who exhibit attachment issues behaviorally, affecting their families and those around them.  I am speaking about children who are on the more serious end of the continuum, who exhibit behaviors because of their attachment disorder issues.  One example may be that of children who have an excessive need to be in control, and because of that need, they do many things to stay in control, not trusting parents, not trusting parents to take care of them because of that primary abandonment.  Because of this behavior, they do not love, nor let themselves be loved.  Another brief example would be the same children who would never ask for help or anything they might need, as that would give the parents power.  They will act out to get needs met vs. asking for help....

I checked out the stats on my blog and was blown away when I saw that there are visitors from all over the world.  The good news is that there is an awareness of Attachment Disorder all over the world.  How much so, I do not know.  I have a friend who lives in France and is a therapist, but she says they are just glad to be addressing the ADHD issue, while here, we are seeing many more psychological issues with children, those adopted internationally and locally within the states.  Again, even as in the states, people do not want to see Attachment Disorder, or they want to call it something else like "conduct disorder" or oppositional defiance disorder, among other things.  But then I say, what's at the source of that diagnosis - where does the behavior come from.  When I study the abandonment issues, and understanding attachment and early child development, the theories behind how attachment disorder develops, and how children's brains and personalities de...

As I start to write this, I realize I haven't written in a while. I have done other blogs but this one as gone by the side. My energy in attachment disorder therapy has waned somewhat. My clientele in this area is down as I have quit working with the state of Illinois post-adoption clients as they seem not to be paying me. I donated many hours at this point only to have the state decide not to pay me, much to the disservice of the families and children they have placed in families for adoption. I'm guessing services have been cut everywhere, every state. I've worked with families who have the breadwinner lose their jobs, had insurance cut, wages cut, etc. Meanwhile they have to live with kids who are sometimes impossible to live with. I know I get frustrated with the media, but I'm sure the families do even more so, because the perspective is not taking into account the actual behavior of these children, and how it impacts families. I remember when the woman put her ado...

Remember - CWAD is short for child with attachment disorder. As a therapist I often get involved in some mental gymnastics with my CWAD clients. They are OFTEN very intelligent and yet are very rigid in their thinking. The point of challenging them mentally is to help them see the illogical, irrational thinking they engage in. I certainly don't expect results from this challenging, but I have seen some results. With these children, they often need frequent repetition to re-train their brain. My parent clients are always very frustrated at how these children do not get the message even though they may have heard something 1000 times or more while other children only need instruction a few times. CWAD often enjoy manipulating people and triangulating and these issues often come up in therapy. One of the things I am best at is not being manipulated and this tends to make my child clients very angry. I tend to be pleased when children do not like me as a therapist, because that...

I haven't heard much about what is going on in the world as the therapy world has been very slow due to the economy. Insurance companies are failing to provide reimbursements, the states are cutting their budgets, etc. and people have less money to spend on therapy, even though it is probably more necessary now than ever. I have had a number of families I have seen and then one of the adults lost their job and so they could not see me any more. Since I have been working in schools, the focus is much different. I have previously done trainings for staff in the schools to identify the disorder and that made a huge difference. So, when they identify it, they know something else is called for. From the larger perspective, I have not been involved on the national scene lately, so I do not hear much. There is definitely a great deal more research going on. I saw the story of a young boy - probably not a CWAD - but he grew up in Russia very afraid of his father, begging on the stree...

I have been writing articles for ezine articles, etc. re: attachment disorder. My goal is to make video trainings, etc. for professionals and teachers and parents. These will all be directed specifically to the need. So stay tuned and check out my website. I have finished session 1 for families cd. The therapy field appears to be quiet lately. The states are having financial issues and not paying for services for children, insurance companies are getting stingy with mental health counseling, and the economy has hit families hard. but sometimes it comes down to an issue of survival for families. I also find it difficult to do several jobs at one time and have found myself interested in reaching more people through the internet world. A thought for the day for all those struggling families: Don't take the child's behavior personally - it is not you, it's them! Try to look at the chid more objectively. Check out my website: www.theattachmentgroup.org for further infor...

What is it about children with attachment disorder - CWAD-that is so difficult to live with? Why are parents, especially moms, so distraught? I would appreciate any input. From my work, i see 1. that the mothers are SOOOO upset trying to love and give to a child but that child can have the abilty to love no one, and 2. the ability to be so mean, but also because the child does much to alienate mom, but at the same time they work to engage everyone else and charm them and make mom look bad. So 3. she deals with the abandonment by the child, the constant attack and abuse, the insecurity and sense of failure of self, and also the judgment of others. 4. Again, the father seldom sees the same behaviors that the mother sees so is unable to nderstand at the same level. 5. The mother worries about and takes care of all the other children and hates to see them hurt and battered by the CWAD. check out my website at www.theattachmentgroup.org Christine Appell-Naff

So school has begun. That always bring up many different dilemmas for parents of children with attachment disorder (p-cwad). Some of those issues: The school thinks the mom is crazy, the mom feels very alienated from the school, the child can be cute and charming in school setting, child manipulates at school and comes home feeling empowered, getting homework done becomes an issue, if child is homeschooled there are issues in that, parents have to struggle to decide what their responsibilities are in their child learning, and there is always the possibility that there will be those DCFS calls when the school hears things from the CWAD that makes them question what is going on at home. So, what are the parents to do? Stay tuned.

So, I'm in the process of developing new products - for me there has been a great deal of education on internet marketing and in that I've learned new ways to do things - efficient, etc. I tried audacity for my audio but had to purchase sony audio to use instead. Tim wasted and frustrating. Hopefully this week. CD session 1 for parents will be out. I have 10 editions of my brief newsletter for follow-up if you sign up on my website. I believe my next training to be submitted will be for professionals and another audio for parents. There is so much need for help to get out there and in these financial times, families do not have as many resources. So, pay close attention and see what's coming next. I also have submitted articles on Ezine Articles online, free for your perusal. Hang in there. Remember, you are not alone. Remember our mission is "More peace and joy in your life" because of what we can offer. Christine Appell-Naff, LCPC www.theattachmentgroup.or...

So, that was quick. I am back now-first time since July 15. I have worked on my cd and it is not produced yet, but will be very soon. I also return to my other job soon, so my time will be more limited. I hope to help more people through the development of media. Again, I really do not profess to have all the answers. I find that MANY professionals may disagree with some of my hypotheses developed through 20 years of service. My findings are based on experience, intuition, repetitive findings, feedback, etc. I know that several fields do not accept certain ideas without research and testing. Attachment Disorder and Bipolar Disorder are two mental health areas that seem to defy predictability. Again, many of us in the mental health field can disagree in these areas. My main goal is to help the families survive, and the population I often work with need different levels of services, including a great deal of support for parents and validation. Chris Appell, LCPC www.theattachmentgroup.or...

So, as I stated before, I am creating "Attachment Disorder - Session 1" as a therapist with 20 years experience in attachment disorder therapy. I feel there are many families who cannot come to therapy and the ones who do come benefit greatly from having someone there who gets it, understands their perspective, and understands their children. Hopefully, this cd will be available on august 3, 2009. The price will be $24.95 for a hard copy. I will decide about producing an mp3 download for $19.95. So please stay tuned. You can check my website at www.theattachmentgroup.org - i will be updating soon. As my practice continues, and those who adopt or help families in need by taking care of their children, the issues of attachment disorder continue. I will do my best and perhaps you can tell others about this. I also hope to record a training for professionals, as I have done 7 hour trainings, I just need to record them - the material is there. I also ha...

Hi -News from the Office - I work in Illinois with many foster/adoptive families. Well, things aren't looking so good right now for those families. The state of Illinois, as with many other states, is in dire financial straits. Well, it seems they are willing to play games with the children and families that have adopted these special children with many difficult needs. I do not believe it is the state department dispensing of the children's needs, but the politicians deciding it is not their problem - they are more invested in political battles. I am not sure what these families will do, also at a time when insurance companies are more restrictive, when jobs are being lost, and money is slim - they will be left on their own with the disturbed children they care for. I am anxious to see what happens. Again, it would be my deepest wish that children would not be born into families that do not have the love, desire, and or capacity to take care of them - that is the true cr...

This summer I will be working on a new cd and perhaps other cd's, depending on time available. My first goal, which has been a goal for some time, is to produce a cd for first time sessions with parents who are living with children with attachment disorder. I have seen such joy in families when they have had their first meeting with me. I would like to be able to reach more families and this cd will be out in July, 2009. Please let people know about this opportunity. Again, I can help more families this way and this idea has been sitting there for many years. I am a therapist who has been working in the field for 20 years and feel that this will be an excellent resource for families. Thanks for your support. Christine Appell, LCPC